Guildmerge

[Sezzaxox]

ok We will get a Pool Table. NOW!!

let us leave

[Rushton]

*comes up briefly for air*

What? Soldierguards? Send Matthew, he's been practising recently.

(Wooo! First Base! You magnificent specimen of manliness Rushton!)

*flexes muscles*

[Sezzaxox]

Yes there are solider Guards they want to speack to the MASTER of obernwtyn, so can we vote that they get a pool table now and then you can go.

[Lina]

*Bursts in*

Guildmistress!! Guildmistress!! Come quick - it's... *falters*

(Um, what the heck is happening in here? Why is Elspeth under the table, Rushton flexing his muscles and is that Dragon coercing images of what looks like her kicking Rushton and Matthew on a leash by her side??)

*stands confused*

[Kella]

What seems to be the problem Lina?

(Whatever it is I don't think Elspeth is going to come up for air any time soon. Maybe I should help Dragon with her plot... Al least then I can get back these stupid people who see fit to punish me by making me come to these horrible guildmerges...)

*Sees Lina is still confused*

Has anyone figured out when we're going to vote? People need healing you know. And I can't exactly help that cause here, can I?

[Dameon]

(First base? Son of a... How to get Elspeth up here...)

*falls off chair*

OH LUD!!! THE PAIN!!!! OH! OH! IT HURTS! SOMEONE HELP ME! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!!!!!!

[Dragon]

*grimaces*

(Dameon needs acting lessons)

*coerces blood to appear on dameons head*

[Kella]

(Finally! Something to get me out of this dreaded place!)

Awww poor Dameon. Come now, I'll have to take you to the healer hall and you'll be fixed right up!

*Holds Dameon up and takes him to the healer hall*

[Sezzaxox]

RUSHTON COME OUT NOW OR THE SOLIDER GUARDS WILL COME IN, AND SEE YOU UNDER THE TABLE. COME OUT NOW, DAMEON IS DIEING AND SOLIDER GUARDS ARE ATTACKING AND YOU MIGHT WANT TO SEE DRAGONS IMAGES.

(when will they get out.)

[Dameon]

(Kella! Damn you, you stupid wench!)

No... no... I'm alright. I must stay in Guildmerge. I must... I can't leave during such an important discussion. I can't!

[Lina]

(hmmm things seem to be a little crazy right now... and do they really have to know how Zarak and I brought up a heap of soliderguard horses from one of their camps in the highlands? Nah, I'm sure they won't come up here looking for them, I mean they'd need horses for one thing - and we took them all)

(I think I'll help Kella escort Dameon out)

Here Kella, let me help you with Guildmaster Dameon - he seems to be bleeding - could be concussion.

[Kella]

Oh why thankyou Lina. Don't be silly Dameon you can't stay here like this you need treatment. Don't worry about a thing we'll take good care of you.

*Forces Dameon out the door*

You're pretty strong aren't you Dameon?

(either strong or heavy either way he doesn't want to get out of the room. Well I have a chance to get out of here so I'm taking it and the Empath guildmaster is not going to get in my way!)

*Pushes Dameon a little bit harder towards the door in order to quieten his protests*

[Dameon]

(Unhand me, you cantankerous healing harpie!)

Really, Kella, I'm just fine. Why don't I just lie down under the table for a while. If you can get me some headache tablets, I'm sure it will all heal up.

[Dragon]

(Dragon needs to visit Teknoguild caves...should go now while everyone is busy.)

*checks room*

(Elspeth and Rushton under table, Kella and Lina busy with Dameon, everyone else busy with pool table and Elspeth and Rushton under table....good time to sneak out, no one notice)

*sneaks off to work on next part of her evil plan in the tekno caves*

[Elspeth]

(Breathless. Very, very breathless.)

Rushton?

(Why is he over there, flexing his...)

Ooooooh.

(I didn't even know he had muscles like that. It must be from carrying all of those piglets around.)

(It sounds like chaos up there. They need a firm hand, someone who can take control, someone who can use fancy words and sound all leadery.)

*thinks, whilst looking soulfully at Rushton*

(On the other hand, while they're all distracted...)

*crawls back over to Rushton whilst avoiding all the kicking*

[Swallow]

*saunters in with no idea what is going on and takes the nearest seat resting his feet on the table*

So, pool tables, hey? There's a lot of things that you can do with a pool table.

(naturally my enigmatic smile will of course have all the people in the room swooning, and then they will all forget to ask me what I am doing in the middle of one of their Guildmerges when by rights i should be on the other side of the Land. It's so lonely at the top...)

*winks at no one in particular knowing that all the women in the room will naturally assume he is winking at them*

[Kella]

Fine Dameon if you want to kill yourself go right back in.

*Lets go of Dameon and watches him walk back to his seat swaying*

*Sighs and sits back down disappointed*

(Stupid crummy guildmerge... Why do I even have to be here? Oh great Dragon has gone... Taking advantage of the disruptions... I should have done that... Sneaking away... smart girl... Oh my Lud! What does Swallow think he's doing? Great! Now I really want to leave I am not in the mood for his flirting tactics... I've had to put up with Domick all night and now this! I need to get out of here now!)

[Elspeth]

(Did someone just wink at me?)

(Are those Swallow's legs? How did he get here?)

...

(And why is Rushton gritting his teeth like that?)

(Oh, I have a feeling I am about to be very breathless again very soon.)

*smiles secretively*

[Rushton]

(I am so ripped...)

*poses again*

(Rushton's Super Spiffy Plan For Winning the Affection of Elspeth Gordie, and Doing Away With All Possible Rivals Whilst Leading the Misfits and Guiding the Land to a Better and More Harmonious Society In That Order - Phase two now we have established *ahem* relations)

(Point the sixth: Coax Katlyn to brew minty fresh tincture every morning, for perfect kissable breath. note to self: polish teeth for blindingly white smile)

(Point the seventh: Compliments, compliments, compliments!
(a) My, Elspeth! Your eyes are a lovely shade of moss-green.
(b) Those trews suit you perfectly, even with all the patches!
(c) Your mindshield is particularly sparkly today.
(d) I love the scent of horse in the morning.
(e) You are nothing at all like a bar of soap.
(f) Well this is a touching moment...)

(Point the eighth: Collect flowers to leave on her desk. Note to self: see Roland about the raging case of Poison Oak contracted)

(Point the ninth: Whittle self a large clublike bat, with which to hunt down any male that looks askance at object of my affection. That hessian sack in the cellar may come in handy)

(Point the tenth: See if Roland has any "herbal supplements" so that my muscles become even more amazingly defined. Oh yes! I am HOT!)

*hears Swallow*

Was that...?

*comes out from under the table*

*scowls in unfriendly manner shooting looks of threatening jealousy*

[Roland]

*rushes in late, carrying a basket full of herbs*

Hello everyone I'm terribly sorry I'm late!

*stops in confusion*

(Who in the hell is that dashing fellow with the ponytail?)

(Why is Rushton glaring at him?)

(Where on Earth is Elspeth??)

*Sits down next to Kella*

*raises eyebrow*

So...what did I miss?

[Sezzaxox]

HI Swallow, and Roland.

*goes round and sits next to swallow*

So how are you today Swallow........

*Kicks rushton back under the table*

Oh and roland you haven't missed anything, Much, and elspeth is under the table with rushton........ doing so thing so just kick them when you are bored or annoyed....Same goes to you Swall

[Roland]

*gives Freya a bemused look*

(What an odd, violent little girl. I always thought Freya was so sweet .)

*helps Rushton out from under the table and back into his seat*

Here Rushton....have some hirudoid a compress to help with those bruises on your legs.

[Kella]

(About time! Leave me as the only healer in here does he?)

Oh thank Lud Roland I keep forgetting to talk to you about the plans for the new medicine cabinet. Katlyn has been generous enough to give us some of her herbs to use and I have started a little garden right next to our hall to grow our own herbs. Also hows young Zarak doing today? I heard he had a big fall last night and that you have been taking care of him all night poor fellow.

(Hmm... Have I missed anything? I want to pay him back for all he's missed... Leave me alone for the majority of guildmerge you rat. I'll get you back for that... Oh yes I will)

*Smirks and tries to conjure up ideas*

[Dameon]

(Dammit! Why do people keep putting Rushton back under the table! That's not where I want him to be! Curse my sweet and caring demeanour!)

*kicks Rushton in the head, as hard as possible*

*kicks him again*

ARGH! Leg spasms!!! Oh goodness me, I'm so terribly sorry!

*kicks again and again*

ARGH!!!

(Take that Mr. White teeth shiny face!)

[Elspeth]

(Ow.)

(My head.)

(Why did Dameon just kick me? Why does the world conspire against me to hate and pain me? Why? Is it not enough that I am giving my life to a quest to save them all?)

*cradles head in hands while stoically not sobbing at the unfairness of it all*

*shouts*

Has my lazy ward come back with those bits of paper and pen yet?

(Ow. I shouldn't have shouted. My poor head!)

(Oh, is that Roland? At last, someone with a small amount of sense and intelligence has wandered into Guildmerge.)

*crawls over to Roland and emerges from under the table*

Roland, do you have something for a headache and some nasty bruises?

*glares at Dameon*

*wonders why he's not noticing*

(Oh, that's right.)

*directs feelings of spite and resentment at Dameon*

(I know I am no empath, but surely he will feel those.)

(And to think I believed we were once good friends.)